You will always find people who have had success in a particular way of dating because there is such a vast number of variables at play. Long distance relationships is one of those activities that for the most part give people a false hope or a lack of control in the outcome, and in my opinion kills your self-esteem.
Ramon Thomas
Psychology of Technology Blog
Dr John Demartini works with South African Police Services
Over 600 senior police men and women flocked to the Montecasino Ballroom in Johannesburg and a week later a further 600 to The Westin Grand CT Arabella Quays to hear human behavioural specialist Dr John Demartini speak about ways in which they could empower their positions as police men and women in South Africa.
This Demartini Institute initiative, partnered by The Star (Independent Newspaper Group) and The Community Policing Forum (CPF), was designed to inspire and empower the people who play such an integral role in protecting South Africans. This is the second presentation to the SAPS, the purpose of the first talk was to inspire vision whereas this second talk was designed to address practical steps to assist the SAPS take their inspiration into action.
Dr Demartini pointed out that they (the police) are at this talk which means they truly care and are receptive to innovative ideas. “You obviously have a vision to protect society or you wouldn’t have joined and sustained your police service and whether you realize it or not your very presence makes everyone become more accountable,” he said. He likened their fight against crime to moving a large boulder. It is tough at first, but the boulder starts moving slowly and it eventually gains great speed or momentum. ”You can create or build almost anything through persistent action and by momentum and this can be applied successfully to crime fighting.”
Dr Demartini said life is designed to be challenging and only through challenge can we grow. He explained that focusing on problems alone is futile and that great things can be achieved by concentrating efforts on solutions and by taking accountable actions. Dr Demartini shared that in most of his talks and interactions in South Africa, in his experience the majority of South Africans are truly behind the police force and are grateful for their persistent efforts and accomplishments. He urged them to hold onto their vision of possibility, have clear objectives and apply prioritized actions that have a high probability of achievement and make sure that their vision is bigger than any criminal’s. “If man can set foot on the moon through one man’s vision, you can, as a collective force, change the crime statistics in South Africa,” he said.
Special thanks go to:
Montecasino and Dalene Devereux in Johannesburg and The Westin Grand CT Arabella and Martin van Oordt in Cape Town for assisting this crime combating drive by arranging and sponsoring the talk venues and to Gear House (Kelvin) and Integrity Sound (Alex) for sponsoring the sound equipment. To Commissioner Naidoo, Commissioner Reddy and DCP Daniels for their time, trust and permission to activate our vision of empowering and inspiring police men and women in South Africa. To Moegsien Williams, Editor of The Star (Independent Newspaper Group) for activating the opportunity and assisting in the coordination of these events. To Lionel and Geoff Green from the CPF for their invaluable insights. To Tracy O Brien for the introductions that made this all possible. Most importantly, thank you to the men and women in South Africa who dedicate their lives to the service of South African society, you are the heroes within South Africa and your actions make a difference in the lives of many every day.
A Special Note:
When someone believes in you, you increase in self worth and rise to the occasion. Long-term visionaries know to stay the course. They don’t focus on how things aren’t being done; they wisely look at what is being done and what can be done. They are solution orientated, not problem focused. As a nation, hold a vision for South Africa, don’t let outer forces deter your vision and actions towards it; look for what is working; acknowledge the heroes; be grateful for the men and women who put their lives on the line to protect and serve South African society. When you see the genius in another, you have the power to awaken the genius you see. Acknowledge the heroes and show your gratitude, for when you are grateful, you get more to be grateful for.
How Henry Ford used the Mastermind Principal
Henry Ford, while appearing as a trial witness, was badgered by an attorney who tried to discredit his testimony by calling his education into question. Mr. Ford was asked a few questions about American history which any high school student could easily answer, and when he did not know the answers, it placed the attorney in a most advantageous position, until Mr. Ford stated that he was successful man, responsible for a great number of people and in control of a great deal of power. He had little use for such knowledge, and if by chance he need it, he had at his disposal people who could get him the answers to those questions in minutes. Bravo!
In Henry Ford’s retort, there is a valuable lesson for every one attempting become financially independent. That lesson is commonly known as the Mastermind Principle. In short, it means having at your disposal a body of knowledge in human form which you can consult when the need arises.
Here’s an example: A doctor tends to earn a substantial amount of money his job, and is faced with the harsh reality that he can never be as well informed about his job as he’d like to be. So to manage his affairs, he has an accountant, investment advisor, a banker and a stock broker. And to help him in his job, he consults with specialists, other general practitioners, talks to hospital staff and consults with the most brilliant men in his field whenever the need arises. These people are his mastermind group, and they provide him with the information he needs when he needs it reducing his need to spend great amounts of time hunting up this information for himself.
The importance of such a group in your life is not to be underestimated. If you intend to operate your own business, you MUST have a mastermind group if you are to learn and grow with the fewest setbacks.
The formation of your mastermind group requires nothing more than the establishment of contact either for business or social reasons with the people who have the knowledge you will need to draw upon to help yourself. The selection of the mastermind group is somewhat more difficult, for you must choose the finest people you know in every field you wish to have. Never, ever shoot too low. When you approach these people, tell them exactly what you want to accomplish, why you have contacted them, and offer them any help they might need that you are able to give in return.
You will generally discover that the old saw is true: the bigger they are, the nicer they are, and the more willing they are to help others. Chances are excellent that they had to do the same thing you’re doing in their climb to the top and are ready to return the favour. By the way if you find your first few contacts bring you no results, perhaps you had better evaluate your choice of role models and your motives for choosing those particular people.
Mail order people especially should establish mastermind groups with other mail marketers. Don’t be secretive about your techniques, facts and figures, especially in your advertising.
Wouldn’t you love to swap facts and figures in person or in personal letters with people at least as experienced as you? You can imagine the savings in investment in new programs alone, since you’ll be able to find out from others how they have done.
The worst thing you can do once you’ve established the mastermind group is not use it. You have flattered a number of people by asking for their help. Do not insult them by not taking advantage of the situation.
Make a commitment to offer the same help to others once you have made The climb to the top is said to be a lonely one, but it should never be that way. It’s easier to pull things than push them, and believe us when we tell you the climb will be a lot easier if you can get people who have already made it to the top!
Healing a broken heart
This article is from one of my guest bloggers and fellow dating coach Tuming Lee:
If you fall head over heels in-love with a guy and he drops you for another girl who happens to be cuter than you… Don’t be in a hurry to cry him a river just yet, instead of crying, take out your notebook and write down the reasons you think he wasn’t man enough for you.
You may cry as you are writing your list, that’s okay, but don’t cry for too long, life is too precious to be wasted entirely on an idiot of a man.
Yes, you guessed right. This break up article is not your typical, let’s-get-the-tissues-out, throw-a-pityparty type of session, it’s about changing your view and seeing the humour in the whole thing and laughing at ourselves for a change. I am done crying over a man, and I wish you’d stop crying over your ex too. He is not worth it, because if he were, he would have respected you enough to not cheat on you.
Stop feeling sorry for yourself. You deserve better in every way.
The Bank Account of Life in South Africa
My mother, Illona Murray, gave me this message in 2000, while recovering from a severe depression. Maybe it is ironic that she has just retired from 33 years of working for First National Bank.
Share this message with someone that is going through a hard time because they need to know someone cares about them. Colman McCarthy often starts his lectures with this, “Nobody makes it alone. It’s always important to show appreciation for what we got.” And one way of show you appreciate them is sharing this message with them when they need to hear it the most.
The Best Bank in the World…
Imagine there is a bank that credits your account each morning with R86 400. It carries over no balance at the end of the day. Every evening it deletes whatever part of the balance you have failed to spend during the day.
What would you do? Draw out ever cent of course!
Each of you has such a bank. Its name is TIME. Every morning it credits you with 86 400 seconds. Every night it rights off, as lost, whatever balance you have failed to invest to good purpose. It carries over no balance and it allows no overdraft. Each day it opens up a new account for you. Each night it burns the remains of the daily deposit. There is no going back. There is no drawing against the “tomorrow”. You must live in the present on today’s deposit. Invest it so as to get from it the utmost in health, happiness and success. The clock is ticking. Make the most of today.
- To realise the value of ONE YEAR ask a student who failed a grade
- To realise the value of ONE MONTH ask a mother who has just given birth to a premature baby
- To realise the value of ONE WEEK as two lovers who are waiting to meet
- To realise the value of ONE MINUTE ask the person who just missed the train
- To realise the value of ONE SECOND ask the driver who has just avoided a head-on collision
- To realise the value of ONE MILLISECOND ask the person who won the silver medal in the Olympics
Treasure every moment that you have, and treasure it more because you shared it with someone special to you. Remember TIME waits for nobody.
YESTERDAY is history, TOMORROW is mystery, and TODAY is a gift, that’s why it’s called the PRESENT!
Give a copy of this message to a friend, for it’s a special gift and may just change their grey dull lives into brightness. There is also a Powerpoint presentation called “The Bank Account of Life” you can view here.
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