Being firm with women - Three Stikes And You’re Out

Men often give women a hard time because they are desperate and have the vain hope, the women will give them sex, if not today maybe tomorrow. In fact that wording in itself is a problem because men that think this way put themselves down, while putting women on pedestals. What I mean is that these men think they have no choice in what women they have sex with. It’s a constant pursuit and it’s also scarcity mentality.

A rule that I’ve seen mentioned by a few different people like Tom Leykis and other teachers in the seduction community is the three strikes and you’re out rule. This rule comes from Baseball, where after three pitches, and no hit, you’re automatically out and have to leave the playing field. So I have realised this is a very good attitude for men to have. It saves time and creates a very clear boundary for what you are willing to accept and not. In my last post I wrote about a woman who called me and casually mentioned being tired and how I dealt with her.

Let me share some more about her with you to demonstrate the games and bullshit we guys have to put up with. When I first met her at Moloko, she danced with me and grinded her ass on me and all the sexually suggestive moves you normally see in hip-hop music videos. She came over to my place last Friday night. And to make a long story short we never had sex because she mentioned it was that time of the month, etc. On Saturday night I had a big Spring party (photos coming soon) and she came over earlier and along with my friend Aretha. I appreciate this kind of willingness from anyone to help out.

What I do not expect is disrespect at any stage of a relationship. After some people started arriving she practically avoided me. And especially after my friend Berker, who looks like a male model, arrived she spent the rest of the evening almost glued to him. And some other people at my party made this same observation to me. And some of them actually believing she was with him, and not me. No I have to state clearly she was not with me and I have no problem with her talking to anyone because we are not in any sort of relationship, open or exclusive.

She, Aretha and Berker left for Moloko and I joined them later with another woman from my party. And strange things were abound. Firstly Berker took me to dance a few meters away from all the women. And he tried to fix me up with some other random woman, not to bad looking, dancing next to us. He left to rejoin the women from my party. And eventually we left early because she got some cramps (that time of the month). The next day she sends me a text message apologising for being such an ass hole, dancing with my good friend Berker the whole night, and she only did it because I act indifferent when other people are around and only seem to like her when we’re alone.

I learned the hard way not to become to possessive to early on. So when I meet a woman I will give her a lot of attention when I’m alone with her because I’m creating attraction and building rapport. And so when I’m in a public place or crowd I will never, ever place any demands on the woman. In fact I learnt from David DeAngelo to encourage independence in people actually brings them back to you because it shows very clearly you’re not needy and you have high self-esteem. So this was the third strike for me and she’s out…NEXT!

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